How can I turn 20?

It doesn't make sense to me. It seems as if it was just yesterday I was sighing and dreaming of the future and now that it's finally here, I don't want any of it. I want time to stop because I can't gather this mind of mine together and think straight. To look young is one thing, to feel young is another. Given, this feeling will probably do me good - later in life. As for now, it's time to face reality. I'm turning 20, fucking 20. This is not in any way any of the lives I imagined I'd be living by this age. But that is life, huh? Nothing goes as expected.

Pretty much.